Leap of Faith

So, here I go. Stepping out on a high wire, towering above a fog-covered unknown. Of all the things I’ve attempted in the four plus decades of my life, I thought that getting ordained in ministry would top the list of far fetched. I’ve come to realize that I cannot put too much weight into my thoughts as they pertain to reality. I deserted that response when I gave my life to Jesus. There’s a new chief operations officer calling the shots and He just asked me to go to Africa. Far fetched is a bit conservative–it’s straight up crazy talk. You see, I worry a lot. About e v e r y t h i n g. It’s a condition and I’ve been working on it for years. I am a lifelong sufferer of anxiety who rivals the ruminations of Bob (of What About Bob?) and Joe (Joe Versus the Volcano) combined. So, the idea of leaving my family and heading to West Africa, an area teeming with disease, famine, poverty and violence stirs me up a little. In truth, when I first heard about the trip, I made a long checklist of all the reasons I couldn’t go. I stuffed the thought in the archive section of my brain. I was quickly reminded of God’s ability to retrieve archived musings and billboard them for His purpose. Despite my ambivalence about the trip, I began to see God directing me with flashing, 3-D arrows toward Sierra Leone. We know when He’s directing us and then we’re left with two options: to obey or not to obey. And so, I’ve put in my papers for a passport.

I went to the first official team meeting and listened to the details of the trip. I fought the urge to pick up and run at the first mention of Ebola. I stayed through the end of the meeting in our air conditioned, creature-comfort equipped conference room and made every effort to imagine the people who we would meet in the city of Bo. I pushed aside mental inclinations toward scenarios involving airlifts back to the States and focused on the beauty of the mission. I envisioned broadly-smiled friends with a similar mission to teach lost people about Jesus. I immersed myself in Google images of people, food, vegetation, common Krio phrases, wildlife and culture in Sierra Leone. The concept of boarding a plane and stepping out onto a new land became more than a crazy idea cooked up by people far more saintly than me. It has become my vision and basis of comparison for everything else going on in my overly-busy life. If I can commit and look forward to going to Africa, then I can do ( …).

Alas, here I am, about 3 months away from this trip and just a few steps into the journey. Far fetched or not, He is able to do immeasurably more than I can ask or imagine. For today, my thoughts have me embracing strangers in a far off land, worshiping the One who knows us better than we know ourselves. As they say in Krio, a de go (goodbye) for now.

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